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Please consider our latest offering, THE LAST SLUMBER PARTY, as it may be the stupidest teen horror film I have ever seen, and that’s a considerable statement. This may well be the slasher-pic equivalent of “The Room.” 

A madman terrorizes a slumber party. Maybe two. He (or they) do it slowly, haltingly, ineptly. Lines are flubbed, shots lose focus, marks are missed, no matter, the camera bravely marches on.  And it ends as pointlessly as it begins.

So it all adds up to great viewing for a summer night, under the stars, in the cabin, Hell, even on the phone.  See it with someone you love, because anyone else might hit you.

I pretty much always download the VODs (VsOD?) the moment they drop, so I’ve already watched this one… and it’s pretty fantastic.  I’ve seen more 80s slasher pictures than any sane person should, and I’ve never seen one worse than The Last Slumber Party.  It’s a damn-near perfect riff movie, and the Rifftrax crew doesn’t disappoint.

I have seen the future of Hip Hop, and it is Frank


Pixar can never top this.

Lovely but Deadly -”Who runs your school?”
And do they wear short shorts and do that “talk to the hand” thing?What the hell kind of school are you attending?

Midnight Cabaret -”The hot spot where Satan’s waitin’.”
The devil can’t claim your soul right now.He’s over there, taking in a show.Maybe during the intermission…

Night Nurse -”What is the terrible secret?”
That the wheelchair is kept too close to the dry ice?Because that secret would be truly, truly terrible.

Amazons of Rome -”A thousand tempting beauties… They fought like ten thousand unchained tigers!”
The unchained tiger simile ups their fighting prowess 10x.

Post Impact -”Where the world ends, survival begins.”
Because no one was surviving before the world ended.

Absence of Malice -”In America can a man be guilty until proven innocent?”
Yup.  All the time.Next question.
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